to uncle boy

my earliest memory of you was when you were trimming my fingernails,now, I couldn't even return the favor..last wensday,nov 15 as i see you unconscious and restless @the ER...i just went numb.blank.heart pounding
..I felt nauseated.lightheaded.I was embarassed that I could faint don sa treatment room. .So i went out,leaving you to somebody else's care.I went to the church you know.I prayed.for you.
But there are things out of my control..it's a lesson I learned and still learning.the night before you died,I talked to God.to take care of you..
I denied myself of crying 4 u in the hospital because I have to be strong or pretend to be for mama.
I love you.May God welcome you home uncle boy.May your soul rest in peace.
give my love to tatay...will you.ill b praying for you.
thank you very much for everything.

love,
yangyang

mardi gras

grey's anatomy

meredith grey: Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we
want to succeed. And most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see
what we want to see and believe what we want to believe, and it works. We lie to
ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. We
deny so much that we can't recognize the truth right in front of our faces.