ah.basta

i'm terrified .
I'M WORKING TOMORROW MORNING.AND TOMORROW NYT AS WELL.I'll try my best to get some Zzzzz .
hopefully they put me n clare together...
cheese and rice...sunshine and lollipops.

I easily get tired of doing the same things everyday...well before my resident lolos and lolas died..now,i'ts a new batch of mentally ill,sometyms annoying residents.

3 people had died in a week..2 were expected ,the other a surprise.it really comes in 3's..
to mike boy,eds and ray md may u find peace wherever u all may be..

It's very hard not to feel grief..everyday,well most days of the week i feed and care for them.put them to bed at night.talk when they don't even answer back.or try to find some sort of content to what they say..

mike or mikee boy as i call him,wanders early in the morning..i see him on the hall way n greet him a good morning and he would always say good morning dear...he turns the lights off(in other peoples room)

ed's is lady edna..who would say things u least expect

ray md.well i really haven't been attached since his room is downstairs and I'm always upstairs


I'm hoping to get paid mor than a grand..

just needed to pay myself more and my bills,


hoping for a good night tonight

Sicut me Deus adjuvet

ever mine

eastbourne was nice...something new since the seashore was covered by what the english call pebbles.and what i define as bato..as in

ding ang BATO..had a bit of d sun n sea.the bloody cold seawater.twas reall scorching--the sun but the water damn cold.

i did enjoy it.nobody cared f sombody went topless or naked ..or that somebody with the bulges or lumps of adipose tissues wrapped around her body go swimming wearing a swimming suit..well kinda decent don't u think ?it's one piece.

hopefully my boss won't sack me..at least not yet.

or that the home office won't get me deported..i don't even have money saved much less to buy a plane ticket .

Sicut me Deus adjuvet

eastbourne experience

5th of july..had decided to try out english summer,or at least an english sun at the beach.me n my mate,jade went to eastbourne.it;s a seaside town.about 2 hr bus ride from maidstone.we did enjoy eating fish n chips.n sunbathing(feeling puti)n swimming n d sea.dey sed it would b pebbles.haha.its stones!but sand na pag sa dagat kna.i didnt expect the dagat water to be bloody ice cold though.the sun s hot but water will make u squirm n shiver.i had the idiocy of wearing my headband,so i lost it n sea.
after a nice quick banlaw we headed for the shops.seafood serve cold in cups,ice cream n candy shop with all sorts of sweets.i bought loads of dried pineapple rings.then came 5pm .time for the bus to pick us up.we went on a 2 decked bus with 50 elderly pipol.kmi lng bata..wer tired n burned as in sunog.i can feel pain n my arms olready.i had a nap n wen i woke up i had a sudden abdominal cramp telling me m supposed to hurry n find the nearest toilet.no such luck as we were still on a bus full of elderly pipol with no toilet n site(puro grass n trees)i told jade i badly need to do number 2.she asked me to hold it in we will b arriving shortly..shortly meant an hr.toture.i even asked her to buzz the bus to stop ill go poo anywere.even on grass.i was olready crying n begging n cursing the blasted shellfish,prawn n mixed seafood serve cold i ate b4 we went on the bus.
so i did buzzed it.went down at the side of the road n poo.pood for england n the philippines n a thorny grassed area on the side of the road.right at that moment i didnt care at all.f anybody sees me
after much pooing.i didnt hav much wet wipes to wipe it all hence my beach towel,n my shorts became the sacrifice.luckily i brought some pairs of knickers n jade has an xtra pair of shorts.it was the most terrible experience ever.in my entire existence.
cars always pulled over since ther wer trafic lyts.wen i finally deemed myself presentable but without much dignity left. i asked jade to call a taxi for me..n came home with the urgency of seeing the toilet again til the next day.until today.hopfully not anymore tomorrow.i had shellfish poisoning.worst AGE i hav ever experirnced.
i lost my headband,my towel,my dress,my once worn shorts,my 20 quid for the taxi,my dignity,
but i didnt lose a friend.hehe.thankfully jade was wid me.or else i wud've just jump out of a bus in a middle of nowhere.at least she had some sense to at least bring me near civilization,were we know exactly wer we r.hay
im off sick till today. so much for experience.hopfully ill b better tomorrow