I thank God for giving me the opportunity to care for both of you when you weren't well..sorry I couldn't say goodbye yet..Ill still look forward to the weekends when I raid ur kusina or ur pedicure sundays..those lazy sundays sa ledesma--of reading newspaper,each of us on a different section..nanay would always have the one I want to read,so I have to read boring stuff first--like the front page,or the opinion section..be it philstar,malaya or pdi.the countless humba,adobo and kambing!for understanding that wen and madi are the only ilocano words i truly understand.hahaha.salamat sa sleepovers ko before..sleeping with tatay's huragok and the my wobbly tooth.regards nlang ko k tatay nay.
salamat nanay mencing,salamat nanay charing...^^

:"""(

I cant even cry.
I am now grandmotherless .losing my nanay mencing 2 and half weeks ago,now my nanay charing naman.
two great women in my life.the mothers of my parents..
It got me thinking...do I regret leaving ?
I didn't realize that that afternoon of november 26th of 2008 was the last time I was gonna see them alive. It was when i was on the way to the van terminal for davao.2 days before I left for the UK.

I feel numb.

I could really use a wish right now

june--was the hardest month I ever had to endure..my best friend got sick..i watched movies like 10 times in the cinema!!
then june 25th as I woke up,I checked my facebook thru my fon..there was a msg from apple (my cousin) saying---ate yang,wala na c nanay.
I denied for as long as i can.praying and telling nanay that just for that day,let me think everything was well and she hasn't left us.
My heart is broken.to smithereens.I loved Nanay so much..I just wished I showed her more..
She loved us all,every single one of us..all nanay's boy and nana's girls..(23 granchildren,10 children)
I wish I made it home last May....:""""(

GLEE

:Something has changed within me Something is not the sameI'm through with playing by the rulesOf someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll tryDefying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

I'm through accepting limits'
Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buyDefying gravity
Kiss me goodbyeI'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down:(

2010

May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you are wonderful. And don’t forget to make some art — write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the new year, you surprise yourself. — Neil Gaiman

Firsts:

First big freeze.the worst winter in UK in 30 years.as of today on my part of the country it's -6..in Nina's it's -11.in scotland it's -21..not to mention snow falling non stop.

I am already 25 years old and will be turning a year older in about 9 months time.
I want to save money for the future.I want to read more books.I want to go visit places.I want to find what it is I'm still looking for..


My 2000's in a nut shell:graduated high school,transferred to davao started college,met new friends,graduated ,passed board exams,failed cgfns,quit first job after 5 months,had chikenpox, been a slacker for a year,trained @DMC,finally worked in my hometown,got visa for Uk.worked and still working as carer and studying at the same time.met new people from different parts of the world *_~


Sicut me Deus adjuvet

got bitten by the BUG

stomach bug aka viral infectious AGE has finally got me.
My residents had it since monday last week,hence the barrier nursing.but it wasn't strictly followed.i guess my co workers really dont know much about controlling infection.most of the staff had got it last wk.I didn't.
I follwed strict rules of washing my hands,changing clothes,shoes,and having a bath before coming in my room or the kitchen.
sadly,as the residents upstairs(where it all started) was getting better,the downstairs people has just got it monday afternoon when I came in.
i felt nauseous already by 5 pm.by the time i got home i felt really ill.didn't bother eating,just went to bed with tummy ache.then @ 4am it woke me up.diarrhea and vomitting ensue.up until 3 am this morning.I hope I'll be better tomorrow,been off sick for 2 days now.I got a lot of things to do.cleaning,laundry,ironing,stock up supplies coz it's gonna be New year..

In memoriam: Mr. D K died last wednesday,Amidst the bug that everybody else had except him.Goddbye mate.have a goodnight ~_^ It happened so soon and I had not said my goodbye,you see I was downstairs that day and wasn't permitted to go up ..
Sicut me Deus Adjuvet

it's snowtym!

jasper my playmate

book back log

my year in books,take aways and shit

my year in books...has been a good year...I've been in england for a year and 3 days now and I can say that I've never had so many book in my entire life..must be 500 now.haha.Most of them are mills and boon romances,a couple of johanna lindsey's,paulo coehlo,jude devereaux,sophie kinsella,dan brown,stephanie meyer,iris johansen,julie garwood,nicholas sparks...I got the brokeback mountain as well.hahaha.
wala cguro araw since that i didnt buy a book..
take aways..and eat ins haha kfc,burger king,mcdo,chinese,indian,mexican,krispy kreme,millie's
shits ..same shit,different day..all shapes,sizes,texture,consistency,frequency,duration and odour...haha and o, i forgot to mention the location...on the floor,wall,bed,on the nails,mouth ...

lessons do arrive,and this time, i think I'm ready to move on..I got nothing to lose because i dont have anything really..lesson number 1---save,save,save

close encounters with sam,piolo,bea,pokwang and LLOYDIE!!!!!!!!

never mind m paper white due to the bryt flash..m with my ate bing..my laovely landlady who's celebrating her birthday..hearthrobs london was such an experience..especially on the way there.doors open @4pm(it's quite dark already,n bloody cold) show star @5pm.
we were driving round n round central london looking for a parking space,then when we finally get there the man pointed us to the wrong direction so instead we were going farther n farther a way then finally we got there..quater past 6 i think.my bladder about to explode.hahaha
n the show already started but without the main event yet..just starters .i've never seen so much pinoys gathered in uk b4..then they shoed the abs christmas station Id...then powkie,sam,bea,lloydie n piolo.
and i love lloydie more.he's witty n funny..throwing punchline with subtlety ...

iI am nearly broke and by the end of the month--payday..I'll be broke again.haaay.
this month my salary will go to school tuition--800 n 250 for room rent/bills.
all that will be left,if there would be any will be for my bus fare n train fare.not to mention the hearthrobs ticket!!my landlady paid it for me so i need to pay her back.

God help me survive.

needs:

• clarks black wedge heels shoes..b4 £50 now 25(I may need it wen i attend the concert,our nsg home's xmas dinner and wen i finally decide to take my IELTS.)
• dress/suit of w/c i havnt found yet.that wud basically cover 3 events mentioned above n more
• money of course to buy all of it.or credit card of w/c m planning to apply for.hopfully dey'll accept it

Sicut me Deus Adjuvet

last lecture

since i lost my phone..iI lost all the picx n numbers..more so I lost my recording of randy pausch's last lecture when he was still alive albeit terminal .It was just a small talk with oprah.I was deeply moved by it ..i had it ever since 2008..although it wasn;t supposed to be for me it was for his children..it is a legacy ..
I'll look for it sa net.i do hope i find it again.its about how to achieve ur childhood dreams.
-----never under estimate the importance of having fun..I am dying soon..but im havng fun..
decide if ur a tiggr,or an eeeyore..tiggrs r energetic n optimistic...
experience is wat u get if u dont get wat u want
brick walls are there for a reason:they show us how badly we want things.
no one is pure evil ..if u wait long enough they will show u their good side

wen u screw up,apolologize..say--im sorry.ti was my fault ,how do i make it ryt